12 Sex Gifts for Men He’ll Actually Love (And You’ll Actually Enjoy Buying)

Because novelty mugs and joke boxers were never going to cut it.

Buying sex gifts for men is a weird little minefield. Half the internet thinks “funny” means edible underwear. The other half thinks a blindfold counts as kink. Meanwhile, you’re just trying to pick something that’s hot, useful, and doesn’t feel like you grabbed it off a gas station spinner rack.

So here you go: twelve gifts that start friendly, get spicy, and end with full-blown “oh, we’re doing this now.” No lectures. No therapist voice. Just good decisions.

1. Because He’s Putting In the Hours

JO Stroker Water-Based Lube

Thick, slick, and made for hands, sleeves, and marathon solo sessions—so he stops “borrowing” your hand lotion and pretending it’s for his dry skin. You both know what he’s doing in that mancave.

Why he needs this: Because Cetaphil did not consent to this.

2. For When “I Don’t Know, You Pick” Isn’t Cute Anymore

The Sex Deck

A stack of sex dares and positions laid out like a Denny’s menu for horny adults. Flip a card, see a picture, do the thing. No guesswork. No awkward “what do you wanna do?” spiral.

Why he needs this: Because men love variety, but they really love having things visually spelled out for them.

3. Because You Didn’t Ask for a Speedrun

Wicked Overtime Delay Cream

A tiny amount buys him extra time when his nether region hits the finish line faster than his intentions.

Why he needs this: Because both of you deserve more than a movie trailer.

4. The Swiss Army Knife of His Crotch

Pleasure Pivot

A vibrating cock ring that boosts his size, hits his perineum, and buzzes your clit at the same time — basically appetizer, main course, and dessert all showing up together and refusing to be served separately.

Why he needs this: Because just one vibration point is lazy engineering.

5. “Exit Only” Is No Longer a Policy

Lovense Edge 2 Flexible Prostate Massager

A flexible, app-controlled prostate massager that puts you firmly in charge of his internal orgasms. You tap. He reacts. You’re the boss now. His prostate got the memo.

Why he needs this: Because you love pressing his buttons.

6. Because Every Guy Likes to Show Off His "Deck"

Classic Porn Playing Cards

A full deck of vintage porn stars that turns grown-ass men into giggling idiots who suddenly forget what a straight flush is.

Why he needs this: Because he’s easily distracted by poker and boobs.

7. Because Some Control Issues Are Hot

No Matter Where Adjustable Restraint System

A versatile restraint system that gives him everything he needs to hold you exactly where he wants you — wrists, ankles, whatever position he’s decided looks best on you. Bed, chair, or anywhere else things end up.

Why he needs this: Because he can’t tell you what to do… unless you’re in bed.

8. Because Every Guy Likes to Feel Big

Max Boost Pro Waterproof Pump

A waterproof vacuum pump that pulls more blood into his erection for extra firmness, thickness, and a very noticeable attitude adjustment. He gets a confidence boost. You get the upgraded version.

Why he needs this: Because his biceps aren’t the only thing he wishes were swole.

9. The “Now We’re Talking” Upgrade

Perfect Fit “Fat Boy” Ultra Fat Penis Sheath

A stretchy, textured sleeve that adds unapologetic thickness and makes everything feel bigger, fuller, and a lot harder to ignore — the kind of change that gets noticed immediately.

Why he needs this: Because sometimes more really is more.

10. "Who’s Alpha Now?"

B-Vibe Beginner’s Strap-On Harness Set

A comfortable harness and body-safe dildo that lets him experience the world from a very different angle. You get the control, he gets a reality check, and somehow everybody wins.

Why he needs this: Because you don’t want him bending over backwards — (just bending over.)

11. A Fairly Even Trade

Arcwave / We-Vibe Sync & Voy Double the Fun Set

A couples kit that gives her the We-Vibe Sync 2 — a wearable, app-controlled couples vibrator — and him the Arcwave Voy, a pressure-adjustable stroker with eight snugness levels. You’re both busy. Nobody’s bored.

Why he needs this: Because parallel play is healthy.

12. The Gift That Never Says No

Autoblow AI Ultra

A fully automated blowjob device that learns how he likes it and then delivers without getting tired, distracted, or emotionally complicated.

Why he needs this: Because sometimes you just want to watch your show in peace.

Final note: This list is designed to be easy to shop and even easier to enjoy. If he “doesn’t know what he wants,” that’s fine. You do.