How To Buy Your First Sex Toy

Five easy steps to buying your very first adult toy like a BOSS.

Buying your first sex toy should be an exciting experience – you get to look at all the shiny possibilities, ask questions you may never have asked of yourself before, and finally take home something that fits your kinks, needs and personality. But it can also be a bit daunting if you don’t know where to start.


There are so many amazing products on the market today that it’s easy to get lost in a forest of dildos. So here’s our guide to helping you choose your perfect sex toy: things to do and questions to answer before you dive into the fun stuff.


1. Masturbate


Yep, this is the first task on your to-do list, so congratulations on having an epically fun job lined up! Before you pick up a sex toy, it’s important to get to know your body a little – work out what kind of stimulation you enjoy the most, and therefore which sensations you most want to get when you use your new sex toy.


Pay attention to the detail of how you masturbate. Are you focusing mostly on clitoral stimulation? If so, a clitoral vibe might be the best toy for you. Internal stimulation of the g-spot? G-spot dildos are your friend. Are you using broad hand movements covering a wide area, or do you prefer your pleasure targeted with pinpoint precision? The former means you’ll probably get on well with a wand toy like the Hitachi, while the latter means you’ll likely prefer a pinpoint bullet vibe, to laser-target the orgasmic sensations.


If you have a penis, the questions will be different but ultimately getting you to the same point: knowing your body so well that you can instantly tell if a sex toy will blow your mind or just blow. When you masturbate, are you gripping your dick hard or gently? Different masturbators will give you different levels of sensation – from tight squeeze to gentle rubbing. If you like to alternate between the two, something like the PDX compression stroker gives you the best of both worlds. And do you focus on the head or do you use longer strokes sweeping up and down the shaft? There are vibrating cock rings for those who like extra stimulation, or want to include their balls in the mix as well, as well as a whole host of prostate stimulators for those who like the kind of intense orgasms that prostate stimulation often brings.


Learning in detail about what your body enjoys will help you establish the kind of sex toys that’ll best enhance your pleasure. It’s also, let’s face it, incredibly fun.


2. Plan your scenarios


Some people want to buy a sex toy to use only when they’re alone: a private treat that they don’t want to share, that’s easy to turn on and use by yourself, and discreet enough that no one would know it was a sex toy if they found it lying on your bedside table. Others are primarily looking for a toy to enhance sex with a partner, so they may want to consider how simple it will be to manoeuvre it between two bodies, or whether it comes with extra features that can be used during partnered play – like remote controls or apps or other exciting techy stuff.


If you’re planning on using a sex toy with a partner, get your partner involved in the shopping experience! While it might be tempting to give a sex toy as a ‘surprise’ gift, in reality it can open the door to some awkward conversations – especially if you’re gifting a toy that doesn’t press your partner’s ‘hell yeah’ buttons. If you browse the site together, you both get to discuss which sex toys you think will work best, and choose something that gets both of you hot under the collar.


It’s also – and you’re probably noticing a bit of a theme here – the most fun way to buy sex toys with someone else. Think of all the sexy conversations you can spark off by asking if they’d be into this or that set of anal beads! Consider the hotness of waiting, together, for your brand new sex toy to arrive! Sex toys don’t just stimulate your genitals, they also stimulate the sexiest organ: your brain. Make the most of this superpower by using a sex toy shopping spree to start all those hot discussions.


There are a few other scenarios you may want to consider at the less sexy end of the spectrum. For instance, do you have housemates who are sensitive to noise and likely to bang on your door at 3 am if they hear confusing rumbling sounds? Maybe steer clear of mains-powered wand vibrators which deliver intensely powerful rumbles but at the expense of being whisper-quiet like some of the better bullet vibes. Are you likely to want to take your sex toy on holiday? Make sure you get something that can be travel locked so it doesn’t start vibrating in your suitcase, causing awkward questions when you go through the security desk.


3. Consider your budget


It would be very easy to open your wallet and just hurl all your money at this site – and while we should probably tell you to do this to keep our bottom line healthy, we’d far rather you got a toy you really wanted that didn’t break the bank. We don’t want you buying something overpriced that doesn’t work for you, and ending your sex toy adventure disappointed. We’d much rather you get one that you love, that’s in your budget, then coming back to us later when you’re ready to expand your collection.


The truth is that there are incredible sex toys at both the low and the high end of the budget spectrum, and knowing how much you want to spend before you start shopping means you can sort toys by price and know straight away which ones are affordable for you. If you’re looking for an incredible masturbator, for instance, you could bag yourself a high-tech Tenga Flip Hole for $92, but if you’re on a lower budget the Tenga Vacuum Cup for $14.99 will do the trick – delivering excellent masturbation sensations in the short term while you save up for a Flip Hole further down the line. Or ask for one for Christmas, if you think Santa might be able to deliver.


4. Consider Cleaning, Hygiene and Safety


Anything you put in your body needs to be clean and safe, so check out our guide on cleaning your sex toys to get an idea of how different materials need to be cleaned after each use. If you’re looking for sex toys that are the easiest to clean, go for materials like metal and glass, ideally with fewer ridges and textures, as those ones will be an absolute breeze to clean up afterwards.


5. Browse, Shortlist and ENJOY!


We’re five steps in and finally you get to let yourself loose on the TabuToys website. By now you should have a good idea of the kind of stimulation you’re looking for, the scenarios you’re planning on using your first sex toy in, and other things you need to consider when you shop. You’re all ready to start hitting ‘buy’ and then waiting excitedly by the door for your new toy to arrive!


Hopefully this guide has given you a good overview of the key things to consider when buying your first sex toy, but in case we haven’t made our core message clear yet, here it is one more time for you to remember when you’re browsing: sex toys are meant to be fun!


The shopping experience is all part of the joy – taking time to consider your needs and desires, and discuss fantasies and ideas with your partner if you’re planning on playing with them. So when you’re scrolling through dildos, butt plugs, masturbation sheaths and more, remember to choose something that you genuinely love the look of. It’ll be giving you orgasms for a long time, after all, so there’s no need to rush your decision.


Enjoy the journey as well as the sex toy you get at the end of it!  





“I didn’t begin enjoying sex until I started masturbating. Before that, I really wasn’t sexual. I bought my first vibrator three years ago. It’s a shame I didn’t discover it sooner."

-Eva Longoria

Feb 18th 2024 Girlonthenet

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